My mom is the best. She reminds me so much of Raymond's mom (from the beloved TV sitcom). She'll see something on a sensationalist TV news broadcast and then calls me in a panic. Typically these calls have to do with Ellie. Like the time she insisted I stopped using baby wipes because of a report she saw. Or like the time she called someone a prick, because she saw it on a show. Things like that. Her most recent panic call went something like this (oh, and this all happens in Spanish):
"Hello"
"Are you spending so much time on your blog that your are neglecting Ellie?"
"...no... if I were spending time on my blog you'd know about it."
"How?"
"Because it would be updated all the time."
"Oh, that's right. Don't neglect Ellie."
Hang up.
I wish I got to spend time on my blog. If anything for my own amusement. So here is a story to make it up to my faithful bleaders (the ones in my imagination, I mean).
Brandon often makes fun of me. Not news. But he often makes fun of me for listening to A Prairie Home Companion. I don't know why, it's a great radio show with comedy, awesome music and cool old-timey ads. What's not to love? But Brandon says that it's dorky that I get the podcast.
On Prairie Home (as us fans call it) there is a section of the show where Garrison Keiller (or GK as us fans call him), the host, talks about his imaginary home town named Lake Wobegon, MI. He usually weaves a really funny story about the town's residents (who are all of Swedish decent and Lutheran) and there is usually a moral at the end such as, "don't mess with other people's rhubarb."
Anyhoo, there is one such story that I made Brandon listen to because I always crack up when I listen to it. It's about a lady that felt that Lake Wobegon was too stifling so she went out to Northern California to find herself, except that she was in charge of an event at the church. This event is approaching and no one knows what is going on so they call her and she answers the phone while she's naked (she had joined a nudist colony). According to GK she gets really nervous because people can always tell when you're talking on the phone naked. There is a mixture of giddiness and nervousness to your voice.
This is where Brandon comes in. A few weeks ago Brandon had called someone inquiring about an internship. This person was busy so they asked if they could call Brandon back in 15 minutes. For some reason Brandon thought that those 15 minutes would be the perfect time to take a shower. So he undresses and right as we he about to hop in the phone rings.
"BRANDON!!! YOUR PHONE IS RINGING!!! IT'S THAT GUY!!!"
Brandon comes running out of the bathroom.
"You answer!"
"You answer, it's your internship!"
And for reasons known only to himself he starts hopping up and down.
"But he'll know I'm naked!"
And so the make-funner has become the make-funee.
In a dryer.
In a panic.
Here she has killed someone and is eating the evidence. Interesting fact: she refused the raspberries and instead opted for the beets. So my kid.
Flopping around while I'm making the bed.
Ellie loves having her picture taken so she comes up to me constantly saying, "Cheese? Cheese?" And why wouldn't I take her picture? She's gorgeous.
Wearing Dad's boots.
Being her sassy self.
Doing important things
